I understand how scissors can beat paper, and I get how rock can beat scissors, but there’s no fucking way paper can beat rock. Is paper supposed to magically wrap around rock and leave it immobile? Why the hell can’t paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can’t paper do this with people? Why aren’t sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they take notes in class? I’ll tell you why, because paper can’t beat anybody. When I play rock paper scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I’m sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole! - Anonymous.

Monday, May 7, 2012

'Dampner' ain't no word.

These words; funny things they
are. Some are beautiful like delightful,
wonderful, magical. Even sabbatical. Ecstatic like ecstasy.
Skeptical. Skeptical is nice. Oh, how I despise
the word nice. Neither an adjective nor an interjection.
What a waste it is. We could do without it.
And then there are these ugly words. Obnoxious, hateful, aggravated, inadequate.
Maybe their definitions make them sound so horrid. But then come sorrow,
hostile, lonely, dismayed, resent. They seem pretty.
Puzzled, peeved, coerced, cognizant are all so awkward. Like
weird. Because I often misspell the e and i. Always. Oh, how I love the
word always. Sounds of a sincere promise. And
obviously there is sublime, jaded, follow, undress, seven, grace, renaissance, silver, broken.
They stay. Forever. Unlike You and I.
'Cause You and I can never be together even if these letters sit next to each other on the keyboard.
They are not meant to be.  Like suave and sassy and savvy.
Love them all so long they are
never together.
These words; really funny things they are.


4 comments:

  1. This post is about different words but what caught my attention are the lines from 'You and I'.
    Reminds me of this particular line-Sometimes a 'We' is not destined from you and I!
    How do you get such 'out of the box' topics! :)

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    Replies
    1. After messing up an exam with the non-existent word 'dampner' :|

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